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David J
08-09-2014, 18:13
Just to kick things off, What do you call a camel with 4 humps - Saudi Quattro

David

Guy Mayers
08-09-2014, 19:05
What do you do when you get attacked by a troupe of clowns?

Go for the juggler.

Sorry....

ironman523
08-09-2014, 20:08
As a father,
never ever let your daughter out with a man
mearing a mac
on a dry day!!!!

Guy Mayers
08-09-2014, 21:05
As a father,
never ever let your daughter out with a man
mearing a mac
on a dry day!!!!

Was he a famous man? I may have found his statue whilst on holiday in Holland a couple of weeks ago....

ironman523
08-09-2014, 22:07
That looks about right, strange people the Dutch (no offence intended to anyone of that nationality), what is that statue entitled?, come on have a go, my guess, " blimey,it's minute"

Sando
08-09-2014, 22:15
...that would be a good one for the fantastic photos thread I've just created !

Guy Mayers
08-09-2014, 22:27
I could post a photo I took from the front but it might offend some of our more sensitive members ;)

Sando
09-09-2014, 13:26
Did you know?........



That statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy?

][\/][ajor
09-09-2014, 15:22
What do I know about dwarfs?.................very little

Cadami
09-09-2014, 15:22
Paddy died in a fire and was burnt pretty badly. So the morgue needed someone to identify the body. His two best friends, Seamus and Sean, were sent for. Seamus went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet.
Seamus said "Yup, he's burnt pretty bad. Roll him over".
So the mortician rolled him over. Seamus looked and said "Nope, it ain't Paddy."
The mortician thought that was rather strange and then he brought Sean in to identify the body.
Sean took a look at him and said, "Yup, he's burnt real bad, roll him over."
The mortician rolled him over and Sean looked down and said, "No, it ain't Paddy."
The mortician asked, "How can you tell?"
Sean said, "Well, Paddy had two arseholes."
"What? He had two arseholes?" asked the mortician.
"Yup, everyone knew he had two arseholes. Every time we went into town, folks would say, 'Here comes Paddy with them two arseholes....'"

Guy Mayers
09-09-2014, 18:58
Doctor, doctor I think I'm a moth....

Hmmm, I think you should be seeing a psychiatrist....


I know, but your light was on.

Sando
15-09-2014, 17:10
Local Police hunting the 'knitting needle nutter’, who has stabbed six people In the arse in the last 48 hours,

...........they believe the attacker could be Following Some kind of pattern.

Skelly
16-09-2014, 20:41
Mate got a job in a factory recycling old shoes.
.
.
.
.
He found it soul destroying