Chairman’s Rant – October 2019


Yep, it’s Yet More Thoughts Of Chairman Norm!

…and yes, I know it’s not October yet, but if all the car mags can release their October editions in August/September, why shouldn’t I follow a similar path?

So - Greetings once more, Stratossers and Similar Saddos!

Well, it seems my previous Rant back in July worked, and got a few of y’all talking and ruminating (I believe you can get that Gaviscon stuff to stop that these days) - so, having set the precedent, I might as well continue this occasional series with a further brain-dump. But first, a slight reprise on the subject of values and the New Order (remember them? I don’t) of buyers….

It seems, according to a few of the mags, that values of “classics” have fallen somewhat of late. No surprise there really – look in the back of any classic car mag and the number of old motors for sale at, frankly, ridiculous prices, is rather large. I’ve often wondered who’s buying them all – are there really so many people with such large wodges of the ole disposable to hand? Well maybe there aren’t. Or people are being a bit cautious, with Brexit, Boris, Donald, Iran, etc. etc. giving them the willies… I think it was all getting a bit overheated meself anyway. Take, for example, the MGB (sorry Richard…). Worthy old workhorse and pleasantly simple it might be, but well over £20K?? Or the far side of £60K for a Big Healey?? And E-Types over £100K (in several cases, well over)! That’s crackers – they weren’t that brilliant back in the day, and unless you’re buying one of those upgraded Eagle E-types or Frontline MG’s (don’t they also do flea drops for cats and dogs??), they ain’t got any better over the last 50 years (unlike me), and especially compared to modern tackle! Anyhow, what’s that got to do with Strat Rep prices, I hear you ask – and, er, actually, it doesn’t seem to have owt to do with them at all… a few of “our” cars have just sold at, or close to, the asking price, which was around what I suggested last time. Why haven’t S.R. prices (Stratos Reps, not toothpaste! - duh!) softened a bit, in line with classics? Well for one, they’re not actually “classics” per se; and for two, they’re so much cheaper than the real classics they’re emulating that they’re still bargains and value for money. Or that’s what I think.
The people who’re buying “our” cars seem to increasingly be the very people we discussed last time – people who don’t actually know much about the kit side of them, the massive variability in spec etc, but who see a shiny Stratos and want it NOW and so buy the thing. I don’t remember anyone coming on the forum and asking any opinions on any of the recently-sold ones with a view to buying – Robin (Longtimefan) posted he’d come across one of them at a classic car meet after it’d sold, and the new owner had never heard of us. So who’s giving these people advice on the car they’re buying? Taking along a ‘knowledgeable pal’ ain’t gonna cut the mustard….it’s not simply a matter of checking for worn wheel bearings, etc, is it? You need someone a bit more clued-up than that. Then again, if it’s just gonna sit in the garage and look pretty, doing maybe 20 miles a year to the MOT station and back, I guess it doesn’t matter – it only needs to have enough structural integrity for the suspension/slowly-rotting chassis to keep the rest of it off the deck and stand up to the occasional shock of a lard-arse like me attempting entry (just don’t go there, OK?). But if it’s going to be used a bit, there’s a danger the reality might not match the rose-tinted vision, and these wealthy people could well end up tarring all our cars with the same pretty mucky brush due to unreliability/breakdowns/inability to match (possibly unreasonable) expectations.
Therefore (here it comes...), I think it might be an idea for some sort of inspection service to be set up, that anyone, not just club members – and open to buyers AND sellers - can use to get an opinion (and maybe a rough value) on a car. I‘m thinking of a country-wide network of people who know what to look for in a S.R., who’d be willing to do the biz in return for petrol dosh plus something for their time…split the country into 4 or 5 areas with a couple of peeps in each. Obviously this’d be a chargeable activity, but it might give buyers and sellers a bit of certainty, and also add a bit of cred to our cars and club as a side-effect. OK, so the way things are at the mo, we’ve not been asked to provide such a service by anyone, but at least if the facility was there, then it’s deffo 'caveat emptor' if someone didn’t avail themselves of it and the shiny Strat they’d just bought turned out to be a pile of poo/not to match expectations. So what do we think? Good idea? Maybe needs a bit of tweaking? Total shite? As always, comments welcome…

And so, having stirred the pot a little, let’s get an even bigger spoon and stir it even more

...cos I’m wondering, what’s this Club we’re in actually for?

Yeah, I know, the furtherance of the enjoyment and appreciation of that there motor that’s displayed on the club logo. Or that’s the “official” line. But in the 3 years I’ve been in this ‘ere club (is it only 3 years?? seems more like 30…), I keep seeing comments after events that all seem to say “where the feck is everyone” or similar (compared to the Good Old Days, which I guess must be a whole, what, 5 years ago? Dunno, wasn’t around.)
So, if the number of cars at events is falling (and I’ll let everyone off over the rather damp Northern Run in August, where you’d have been better off in a Vanguard-class nuclear sub), why is that? What do people actually wanna do with their cars? Cos whatever it is, it doesn’t seem to include driving them…
OK, so you’re never gonna get a truly massive turnout, what with some cars still under construction, some off the road being fixed, some people just not fancying a given event, but I don’t think it unreasonable to expect about 10 (ish) cars to turn up at a Do. But we’re only getting half that, if we’re lucky...WTF?? One of the things you buy a Stratos for is its looks, so why wouldn’t you want to parade those looks at every opportunity? You can’t have a Strat and be shy!! Or is there some dog-in-the-manger thing going on, where “it’s mine, mine I tell you...and no-one else will get to see it, mwahahahaaaa”?

Nah. I reckon it’s simply this: you’re all a bunch of anti-social gits :-P

Yeah, alright, I jest. Well...mostly. Cos if nobody wants to take their cars out for a drive or to go to an event (and, er, that’s the whole point of a car – to be driven!) then what’s the club for? Why are you in it? Is it simply a forum where people go to talk about their cars (and that can get old pretty quickly...you can only discuss the intricacies of the triple-phase thromble exterminator so often), is it some sort of extended Build Guide for those nailing one together, or is it for showing off and educating the public about what a wonderful thing you have (that nobody’s ever seen or ever will see, cos it won’t be going out, Q.E.D.)? In fact if that’s all it is, why not go a stage further and forget all the trouble and expense of buying/owning one, and let’s all simply rave online over our Virtual Strats...

Come on then, let’s hear it. Am I miles off-base here? Am I unfairly accusing people of...whatever? Are we (the Committee) doing this Club thing right – are we giving you what you want? If not, what DO you want? I accept that times change, people change, you can’t make anyone do summat they don’t want to, etc, so let’s have some feedback. And if I don’t get any, I’ll be proposing a motion at the next AGM (er, you ARE coming to that, aren’t you…??) that we change the name from the S.E.C. to the S.A.C. - the Stratos Apathy Club :-P

Not-Despairing-Cos-He-Doesn’t-Give-A-Stuff Norm